3,285 days.

NINE more years.

NINE MORE.

Say it with me people. NINE.

which is actually 3,285 days remaining that i need to have any communication whatsoever with my narcissistic bastard of an ex husband.

i just received an email in which he called me a liar over a discrepancy of 5 dollars.  yup. FIVE mother-fucking dollars.


i have spent the last several years desperately trying to wrap my brain around the notion of co-parenting. i have tried to be nice, i have tried to reach out…have tried to be flexible…

tried to understand...how to split time with my ex and our collective children, yet make decisions together.  here's the thing…for a lot of you - this works…but for me…well - I'm throwing in the towel.

line in the sand.

waving the white flag.


I'm DONE.

R.I.P co-parenting….

see here's the deal.  when one co-parents with a narcissistic bastard, the experience is QUITE different then co-parenting with a logical sound minded individual.  it's wasted time, and wasted energy.  energy i simply do not have to give.   in theory co-parenting sounds AHHHMAZING. not trying to glorify divorce but seriously….you get every other weekend to have some free time to get shit done, you get to have space from a relationship that went south but still be connected to that person who you deeply loved at one time, forever (if you could only see how hard i just rolled my eyes while typing that.)  that is all IN THEORY. You no longer have to cook meals for someone who doesn't appreciate your efforts, or wake up next to someone who took you for granted for 18 years…BUT you still get to have 3 amazing kiddos with said person.

FAST FORWARD to co-parenting with a narcissistic bastard instead….

last week i picked my children up after their "daddy" weekend - to be told that my baby…the youngest - was sick all weekend.  not runny nose sick- but coughed through the night and had to be medicated sick.  and this was the FIRST i heard of it.

i have this habit of picking up the phone to call and tell him when the kids have a paper cut.  because we signed papers saying that is what we would do…CO-PARENT.  

craziest thing is this though…i drop my kids off on daddy weekends and i magically disappear into the ether.  POOF!  i actually do not exist again until sunday night at 8 pm.  i am only a figment of their imagination when i show up at weekend games or events…i have no parenting say or place in this world…because when its a daddy weekend we play house with girlfriend from hell…who my oldest son lovingly refers to as ISIS.  i shit you not.



so people…i am burying the notion.  from this point on we will move forward in a world of parallel play…like toddlers in the sand box - who know each other yet choose not to interact…there will be no more friendly attempts to chat at games - and offers to watch the kids events together…or offer a coffee if I'm making a pre game run.  it is time to lay this to rest….peace out NBXH.


i know i know - you're all hearing that stupid song "now your just somebody that i used to know…"  sigh….maybe i will get it tattooed on my FACE…


3,285…….say it people…3,285  I GOT THIS.